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Have you ever been pair coding with someone who uses shotgun debugging? I am about to claw my eyes out! What is shotgun debugging you ask?
Code doesn't work... What do we do?
I start thinking about possible flow, how to go back to what works, where to insert debugging statements. My partner interrupts my thought and says - what if we change this variable name?
...uh what?
What if that fixes it
It won't!
Well how do you know if you don't try?
I change the variable name - of course nothing works and now I forgot the possible solution I was thinking about...
Starting over... I again start coming close to the idea... Interrupts me again. What if we comment out this random line?
Why what's your reasoning?
Answer: *Shrug* idk might work...
...rinse and repeat
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU???!
I literally started muting my computer sound so I can not hear him while I think and that helps tremendously. This is programming not magic, people!!! Stop throwing random "what if" suggestions!14 -
User: - I'm seeing a redcircle with a white dash.
Me: - What is a "redcircle with a white dash".
User: - It's like a stop sign.
I hope I won't meet this user on a one-way street.2 -
Announcing devRant 2.0! It is time for exciting overhaul, sponsored by our good friends at Tencent, that will bring life back to this amazing platform.
- elegant simplicity of Viber meets excellent minimalism of AWS
- custom avatars for ++ members
- exciting mini-games
- animated stickers
- ChatGPT integration for ++ members
What a time to be alive!9 -
Hey guys, you won't believe what happaned to me, I left my laptop open in a hacker coffee shop and went to take a piss, and when I returned I fou d out that someone stole all my crypto CockRingCoin 😭😭 I lost a million and a half Shekels but then remembered my brother has a cousin who knows a lawyer who's wife is a friend with a wolf who knows a real matrix hacker who can hack CIA using only his toes, I contacted him and you wouldn't believe it but he got all of my cock coins back to me, I don't know what I would've done without him. If anybody needs help recovering crypto I can more than reccomend my dear holy saviour LeHackerCockSucker
WhatsApp: +972-50-EATMYASS-0
Email: ciahacker@cock.gov
But then as I was happily looking at my crypto returned I notice a few payments I don't rwmember making, turns out, my wife was cheating on me! And using my crypto to buy her lover stuff!
So I contacted the afformentioned lawyer who's a friend of the cousin that my brother has, and he helped me file for divorce and punish my cheating wife, for anybody needing a marriage lawyer:
WhatsApp: +972-54-DeliciousPussy-6
Email: eatmypussy@lawyers.porn
I am now happily married with the wolf who's the friend of the lawyer's wife and he fucks me in the ass every night. If you want a good life like mine you know who to call.6 -
I've spent too much time online... I'm in a zoom meeting, I missed what someone said, reached to my keyboard to rewind then realised it was live... 🙈14
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Got an error trying to [Leave] a meeting in Teams
*sigh....*
Just Teams being Teams...
Now I'm probably stuck in that meeting somewhere deep in MS's servers forever.4 -
Social Media. I have had the same message for 16 years from Linkedin ‘4 people visited your profile’. I still don’t give a fuck. Got a twitter account shortly after it launched, I still think it’s totally pointless. Recently looked at Instagram as everyone keeps asking me for it. There is no point to that either. It’s all fucking pointless and just a way to pretend you have a superior life to other sad mother fuckers. God I hate social fucking media!7
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How my day went.
Project Manager: We need deliverable X.
Me: That's not listed.
PM: But we need it. Other PM says what you provided isn't enough.
Me: Too bad. I was not told to deliver it.
PM2: We need deliverable X.
Me: Look at the requirements. It is not there. I'm not providing it.
PM2: We need it. Let me ask PM3.
PM3: We need deliverable X.
Me: No. It's not listed. And here's why it's not even applicable.
PM3: Oh....ok4 -
DevOps Engineer - Entire position exists primarily because Developers don't want to write YAML files5
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The hammer dev. See a problem, they grab a hammer. See a screw? Hammer. Complex social issue? You bet your binary tree it's getting hammered.3
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Oohhh, dropbox... You are pathetic.
I'm a long time dbx user. 10+ years ago they had a programme saying that each new dbx user created using my ref link [on different machines] grants me 500M or 1G of additional space in my acct. Around that time I used to actively fix/reinstall/setup others' computers, so I had an easy access to different machines. This way I boosted my dbx capacity to 27G. For free.
Since ~5 years ago dbx started spamming me with "you're almost out of storage" emails [I'm using ~80% of my 27G]. Annoying, but I understand - they have to keep with the sales. I can live with this occasional spam.
Now, since I got my new laptop, I'm setting up dbx on it. And dbx is SO desperate with their sales, that now they only allow sync on 3 devices max. I had to unlink other 17 devices I've ever logged in from before I could continue.
What's the next step of despair? Free accounts can only sync on weekends?
Come on. This looks ridiculous. Dropbox, get your shit together!13 -
At some point, someone on the visual studio team thought: what people need is a clicky-draggy gui for editing yaml files for github actions.
And instead of throwing him unceremoniously out of the window, the rest of the team agreed, and said: yes, that's a great idea, it will be almost as useful as that clicky-draggy gui for editing sql commands.3 -
Simply having a university degree is not a reasob for a bigger salary comapred to a non degree. Its just a school where you learn some of the stuff you need on the job. Therefore if you prove that you know the same it is the same. Same work same salary.16
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Today I was told I can't use the word retrofit in a sentence because I have to 'use words a nice year old would understand'
There's being an effective communicator and then there's becoming a soulless, creativity killing nazi13 -
Holy heavens! I'm gonna work with a js framework at my day job.
After installing nodejs I'm immediately greeted by a warning that something is somehow broken. Installing the packages for the barebones repo leads to hundreds of dependencies and vulnerability warnings. I don't even know anything beyond document.getElementById().
On a scale of 1 to Squidward Tentacles, how much am I gonna hate my job?8